Transgender Life

I don’t want this site to be solely about being transgender. From my experiences so far, it’s not even something I could write about every week – being in the closet is far more intense and frustrating and writeable. However, there are moments when things happen, unique to trans people. I’d like to share those moments with you, and let you into the mystery.

2017 New Year Message

2017 New Year Message

07/01/17: New Year Message

I had things to share about my Christmas, but it can wait. I'm ill today and don't know when it started, this dry cough. Last night I couldn't sleep, I was cold, it was so cold in my Edinburgh apartment. Under the covers I shook and was unable to stop shaking with cold, despite adding socks halfway through my restless night. Socks and warm hat, and tonight I'll include my woollen gloves and a woollen jumper. I feel groggy and ill, though at least I have my lozenges now, and the Boots Dry Cough Relief.

Sometimes there are other, bigger things to talk about. I would like to talk about my apartment, it's so cold that I barely spend any time there. I stayed in yesterday evening and read by the radiator, dressed for the great outdoors. The book, at least, was entertaining, in a twisted way, Myra Breckenridge, which is a famous 1960s novel about a trans person, though this is stretching it. With books like this, it's no wonder people thought the trans community was full of freaks.

So I was cold last night. I even lit a candle to simulate warmth, while one arm lay on the radiator, the other turning pages. I remember my student accommodation last year and wonder why I didn't renew that tiny, warm student apartment. Something about independence. I'm guessing my experience is not unique, the buildings in Edinburgh having poor insulation, so I've heard. Glamour is at its lowest ebb when you're ill and groggy. I wish I'd renewed that student flat.

So I'm ill today, really ill, and when I try to sleep tonight I'll be cold again though hopefully not so cold that I can't sleep for a second consecutive night. In the meantime, I hope everyone is warm and has a comfortable place to call home. Right now I don't care about being trans, I just wish my apartment was warm.
14.01.17 Back From the Void
Christmas Message December 2016
 

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Friday, 25 September 2020

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